Boys, Lies, & Stereotypes

South Asian parents tend to agree that teenagers should not be dating—especially girls. Sure they’re allowed to have friends that are boys, but no ‘boyfriends’. But what do the teenagers think? We share snippets of their conversation, and let parents take a peak.

SAP: What are some things your parents could do better?

Pri: trust me to not do anything stupid…we’re sensible girls

Angel93: listen to our point of view more.. like not be so set in their views

Nish: maybe be more open minded to different cultures ‘cos we’re growing up in a different society to them and things have changed

SAP: Pri, you say that you’re sensible girls. How do your definitions of sensible differ from your parents?

SoNa: Well their definition of sensible would be different purely ‘cos of the way they were brought up. like as Pri said we have been brought up in Britain where its such a culture for women to be so independent and feisty in a sense…

Pri: it’s like to kiss him (my boyfriend) isn’t sensible for them. for me anything that I’m not comfortable with and 100% sure of isn’t sensible.

Angel93: ye like people here are quite mature and do things earlier than some other places and parents don’t understand that everyone grows up so much faster here like ‘coz of what they are exposed to in every day life kind of thing

*Mish*: my parents version of sensible would be to work and concentrate on getting into university and my version is to have a balance of fun and work and everything

Nish: ive had a conversation about boyfriends with my mum and she is like to me ‘I dont mind you having friends who are boys but i don’t see the need to have boyfriends. What’s the point?’

SAP: And what is the point? Of having boyfriends and dating casually?

Pri: its like relationships that we have from now give us a base of experience on what to expect in the future… what to tell our kids… ‘cos obviously the next generation will probably be 10 times worse

SoNa: having a boyfriend at this age can totally mature your outlook on things providing u take it in the right way… in a sense it will make clear to you what to look for in a man, and what u want in your husband

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