Probably not, but I believe it is a work in progress.
One of the greatest gifts my grandfather gave me was the way he lived his life. I have found that humans fail to triumph because they are attached to an ideal and an identity. My grandfather was neither married to an ideal nor an identity. He was very conscious of the fact that as his life evolved both (his ideals and his identity) would evolve as well. While he had an arranged married, a conventional choice for his time, he accepted the idea that my cousin at age 40 could live with his girlfriend and not ever get married.
He was a man who was part of my generation as much as he was part of his parents’. He blended tradition and modernity in a way that let him embrace the world as it was changing. My grandfather changed occupations, moved cities, spoke several languages, was a voracious reader and had friends of all ages—things I am convinced led him to appreciate that human beings must be flexible when trying to understand themselves and their choices.
Instead of cursing the Internet for its lack of personal contact he started writing emails, appreciating the instantaneous response. My grandfather believed that every way is the right way if it is right for you, and what is right for you today may be wrong for you tomorrow. He regaled in change and celebrated progress. He was not attached to who he was in the past and instead welcomed life’s many transformations.
In my late 20’s I struggle with the idea that my ideal way of life and my identity is not permanent. I strive to find a constant in my thinking and being and the only constant I feel is disappointment. This is an attachment I have not yet learnt to detach from, but one I know I will benefit from the most.
Attachment is rooted in society on many levels–whether material, physical, emotional or internal–it exists and persists from generation to next. But as detrimental as attachment might be, there is one type of attachment that benefits individual souls, though ironically it is not practiced as widely. We have all heard of “living in the moment” as though it were a hymn translated and transferred between religions, musicians, artists, and philosophers.
But I believe the tune is a bit different: it is about being attached to the moment and only that moment. When you can be so attached to a t-shirt, a home, a person and an identity, you are completely detached from the moment that is passing you by. And when your thoughts travel to other places you are ignoring what is right in front of you. For my own self I believe that attachment to this very moment would supersede any other attachment that impedes my growth, allowing me to appreciate more every moment of life.
When I entered my teens I thought I had mastered attachment. I had no idea the world of attachments only began with material goods. As I enter my late 20’s I would like to believe I understand attachment in a very different light; I know the pitfalls and how to spin attachment so I can gain from it. The funny thing is I never knew that even while I evolved, attachment would follow me at every stage of life, and well…. I would be attached to it.
